- not a twit
- Posts
- Lullabies, Sabretooth Stabs & A Corpse With a Mission
Lullabies, Sabretooth Stabs & A Corpse With a Mission
Ancient parents scared babies to sleep, sabretooth cats purred, and WWII spies used a dead body to win a battle—history just got weirder.

Ever wondered what parents sang to their babies thousands of years ago? Or how a saber-toothed cat’s bite compares to a modern house cat’s? And let’s not forget the wildest World War II deception in history. Buckle up—this newsletter is packed with surprises.
🎶 The World’s Oldest Lullaby Was… a Threat?
Parents have been singing babies to sleep for millennia, but some ancient lullabies sound less like soothing melodies and more like thinly veiled threats.
One of the oldest recorded lullabies comes from ancient Babylon, dating back over 4,000 years. Instead of a gentle goodnight tune, it basically warns the baby that if they don’t sleep, a demon will come get them. Yep—nothing like some good ol’ existential fear to lull you into dreamland.
Other cultures followed suit: Spanish lullabies warned of wolves, Icelandic ones spoke of giants stealing babies, and even some English lullabies hinted at creepy figures lurking in the dark. The takeaway? Sleep was not optional.
🔹 Takeaway: If you thought "Rock-a-bye Baby" was dark, ancient parents took bedtime threats to another level.
🦷 The Truth About Sabretooth Cats (Hint: They Weren’t Tigers)
Sabretooth cats were nature’s original bad boys, with fangs up to 11 inches long. But despite what cartoons and action movies tell us, they weren’t actually tigers.
The most famous species, Smilodon, lived in North and South America and was more closely related to house cats than modern tigers. And while their dagger-like teeth were terrifying, their bite was surprisingly weak—only about a third as strong as a lion’s. Instead of crushing bones, they likely used their fangs to deliver precise, deadly stabs to take down prey.
Even stranger? Scientists believe they may have purred like modern cats. Imagine a 600-pound predator creeping up on you, softly purring like it’s about to ask for chin scratches… and then using its steak-knife fangs to take you down.
🔹 Takeaway: Sabretooth cats were less "ferocious tiger," more "stealthy stab machine."
🎭 The Fake Body That Fooled the Nazis
World War II had no shortage of wild intelligence operations, but Operation Mincemeat might be the strangest.
In 1943, British intelligence took a dead body, dressed it up like a British officer, and planted fake documents on it, suggesting an invasion of Greece. The goal? Trick the Nazis into shifting their defenses away from the real target, Sicily.
To sell the ruse, they even planted a love letter, theater ticket stubs, and a photo of a fake fiancée in his pockets. When the body washed ashore in Spain, the Germans found it, took the bait, and diverted their forces. The real invasion of Sicily went much smoother as a result.
🔹 Takeaway: If you ever doubt the power of creative problem-solving, just remember the time Britain won a battle using an elaborately staged corpse.
From eerie ancient lullabies to saber-toothed surprises and a military ruse so good it could be a movie (oh wait, it was), today’s newsletter proves history is equal parts fascinating and ridiculous.
Stay curious—and if a lullaby mentions a demon, maybe just skip that verse.
Yours in delightful discovery,
— Max Whitt🎩🎶🦷🎭